May 24, 2025

All progress starts by telling the truth. - Dan Sullivan

"If you are honest with yourself, when did you know it wouldn't work?" I asked.

"6 months ago."

The client I was talking to faced a situation that all of us have experienced at times: holding on to a relationship that we know isn't going to work out, keeping an employee that just doesn't seem to fit, avoiding the look into the mirror as we know we haven't taken care of ourselves, not having the hard conversations as we hope that it will solve itself (it never does, it only becomes even more painful).

By pretending, hoping, wishing, or keeping up an illusionary picture of the future, even when the evidence shows us that we need to act now, we ignore it. It is a childlike pattern, the one that when we were children and feared a monster entering the room, we would just close our eyes and it would disappear. Yet in the real world, things disappear when you either accept them or face them. As Alan Watts used to say, "If you see a ghost, walk straight into it."

Some people like to play the game of pretending by saying that they just don't know if or if not. In my experience, that is not true. When I spend time with a client, and they give me the "I don't know" answer, I might ask, "But what if you did know, what would you say is the truth for you in this situation?"

"They just don't fit," they might say. See, the mind plays its games with us, pretending to have no power, no impact, no say over things. The good news: you do! You can have a say about how things go in your company, relationship, or life, yet it will come with a price: the price of taking responsibility and being truthful.

And the truth can hurt. The first time I let someone go, it hurt deeply. Also, the second time and the third time. If you care, you will feel. If you don't feel in these situations, you might want to start telling yourself the truth about what the f*** you are doing with your life.

But truthtellers take that pain and embrace it, they welcome it as a learning to respond faster next time, to manage expectations before going all in, to create clear agreements with their people, to be action-oriented, to do what's requested, not what their ego is whining for.

All progress starts by telling the truth:

*   Where am I not telling myself the truth about a situation?

*   Where am I missing power in my life (always an indication of a lie you tell yourself)?

*   If I had no fear, what would I do?

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From love,

Moritz